i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize