I am in a vortex of obligation.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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