you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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