Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize