3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize