if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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