the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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