Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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