1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He better not be in your backpack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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