Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
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when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
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I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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