i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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