K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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