Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
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You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
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Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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