She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize