I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize