never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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