I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize