Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize