Nicole vs. Life
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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