My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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