Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk

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  (612): How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk http://tfl.nu/wp9g
  Replies (7) Good night (884) Bad night (3398) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  now i know why i became what i already was.

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  (310): now i know why i became what i already was. http://tfl.nu/jcnf
  Replies (9) Good night (2167) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.

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  (301): the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements. http://tfl.nu/23am
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  (916): View more from California

  my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.

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  (916): my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out. http://tfl.nu/f1nl
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.

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  (203): Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more. http://tfl.nu/bcah
  Replies (31) Good night (5379) Bad night (1052) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails

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  (313): well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails http://tfl.nu/6yhu
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket

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  (703): I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket http://tfl.nu/mrk6
  Replies (11) Good night (1287) Bad night (2937) Order T-Shirt
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.

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  (705): Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over. http://tfl.nu/0oyy
  Replies (5) Good night (2004) Bad night (685) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats

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  (248): The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats http://tfl.nu/x34n
  Replies (2) Good night (1306) Bad night (518) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.

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  (508): i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail. http://tfl.nu/yrer
  Replies (5) Good night (1802) Bad night (540) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.

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  (423): It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling. http://tfl.nu/7h2p
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia

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  (618): I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia http://tfl.nu/cd4j
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  (530): View more from California

  All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.

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  (530): All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls. http://tfl.nu/uabx
  Replies (12) Good night (684) Bad night (970) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur

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  (610): All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur http://tfl.nu/mu3r
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.

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  (617): I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities. http://tfl.nu/2ow7
  Replies (1) Good night (458) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt

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