So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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