did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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