I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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