True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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