R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
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