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Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize