dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize