i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize