It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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