Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize