i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize