even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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