That's intense
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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