Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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