summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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