you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
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The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
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Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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