i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize