if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize