OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize