Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize