Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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