Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize