We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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