Your mouth is God's brothel.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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