PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think your dad took our porno
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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