Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize