everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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