the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize