i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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